this particular entry was brought to my attention by the good people (to be linked to with fanfare/bombast/celebration) of lolita nation.
it also won my exceedingly coveted 'made-my-day' award for saturday. no doubt it will augur well in whatever imaginary awards show you have planned in your head, too: get your voltr on.

my first week at the new temp job; notable moments scored on a sucks/suckless scale ( 10, naturally, reserved for suckless intstances):

• different pharmaceutical companies customarily provide lunch for the entire staff of the medicine clinic in attempts to make tulane buy their, the pharmaceutical companies', drugs. they either don't know that i'm a temp, or they don't care. they feed me lunch even though i have no buying power with the hospital administrators. those pharmaceutical companies is good people.
  rating: 7.5
  
  
• dr. hammer is a fucking asshole. yeah, i know i didn't check her scheduled appointments before paging you, but don't fucking condescend to me, man. i will fuck you up.
  rating: 3.4
  
  
• my very first assignment is to call patients that have missed appointments in the last month and try to find out why. as my supervisor leaves the room i instantly understand what will inevitably transpire, and, sure enough, two of the patients i call to survey have passed away. both patients were younger than i am.
  rating: 1.7
  
  
• a different pharmaceutical company buys me lunch on thursday. the salad was much better, and, as i have not been paid yet, i am all the more hungry.
  rating: 8.2
  
  
• the only things i have found lying around waiting to be freely ganked were alcohol rubs and latex gloves.
  rating: 4.6
  
  
• a gaunt, elderly man comes in to schedule an appointment with a gastroenterologist. i ask for his doctor's name, and he cannot recall it. i ask him to describe the provider, and he says,"a man in a white coat with glasses." if you knew anything about doctors, this would have made you want to laugh as much as i did. right there, he won the 'made-my-day' award for friday, and he probably would have come through with perfect marks had i not had to actually glean from his statement, and a few more probing questions, exactly who his doctor is.
  rating: 9.7
  

that leaves the tulane hospital medicine clinic with an unimpressive 5.85 overall. let's hope this once-promising team can pull out an explosive finish in the long program.